HomeRoast Digest


Topic: OT RE: +Make Us Laugh Tradition (92 lines)
1) From: Linda Ferguson
LETTER FROM A FARM KID
Dear Ma and Pa,
I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine
Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick
before all of the places are filled. 
I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 A.M.
but I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do
before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop,
feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay.
Practically nothing. 
Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water. Breakfast is
strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of
weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular
food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that
live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you until noon when you get fed
again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. 
We go on "route marches," which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to
harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different.
A "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city
guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks. 
The country is nice but awful flat The sergeant is like a school teacher. He
nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just
ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.
This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for
shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head
and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home.
All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even
load your own cartridges. They come in boxes. 
Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle
with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy.
It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they
got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake . I only
beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130
pounds and he's 6'8" and near 300 pounds dry.
Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get
onto this setup and come stampeding in. 
Your loving daughter,
Alice
Linda in Lakeside, Oregon
mailto:dasofergiehttp://www.wowearnings.com/?r=leebradeRoasting in Cast Iron Skillet
Stitchin on a Treadle


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